dynamic elf

So, my friend has this problem. He -- well, okay, it's me, all right? Just don't tell anyone. I mean, I turn on my AirPort card and I see lots of wireless networks and I can even connect to them! But after a minute or two, I just can't hang on anymore, and suddenly, I drop them all. Not just the one I was connected to, but all of them. It's all black. I can't see a damn thing. Maybe I'm losing my mind. I fumble around in the dark a while, but nothing changes. If I turn my AirPort card off and back on again, there they all are! So I connect; two minutes later, it's the same damn thing. I tried self-medicating with an Apple Software Update and a night of rest, but no dice.

Help me! I hate being tied to the wall! Helllp!