Wow, thank you for this. I might have to do one of my own -- if nothing else, then because the mere thought gets angry NO replies from somewhere inside me. (Wait 'til I'm less fucked up than right this moment, wait 'til I can find better words, wait wait wait.)
For what it's worth: the reluctance to share the negative is very much cultural. You'll be shocked, I'm sure, to hear that Russians are pretty much the opposite on this. And we can't be the only ones. Sharing one's troubles is a sign of trust and friendship, and of willingness to rely on the other person, and trust that that's ok, and that someday they'll be willing to rely on you.
This right here is why it took me the better part of a decade to stop feeling that Americans don't have [what I would consider] significant friendships with anyone.
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For what it's worth: the reluctance to share the negative is very much cultural. You'll be shocked, I'm sure, to hear that Russians are pretty much the opposite on this. And we can't be the only ones. Sharing one's troubles is a sign of trust and friendship, and of willingness to rely on the other person, and trust that that's ok, and that someday they'll be willing to rely on you.
This right here is why it took me the better part of a decade to stop feeling that Americans don't have [what I would consider] significant friendships with anyone.